a new hat

Unfortunately, seeking work in small, rural communities can be challenging. Especially in a time when more people are migrating to urban centres, economic times are tough and primary industry is crumbling. That being said – if you’re willing to be flexible, other opportunities can come along that you may not have considered otherwise. Such has been the case for me.

Contemplating my re-entry into the workforce after being home with my baby for the past ten months has felt daunting to say the least. I have hummed and hawed over a half dozen possibilities – subbing vs. one hour a day teaching vs. a job at the bank… all have their pros and cons. Some offer great benefits, but would limit my ability to work other jobs. Or flexibility with crummy pay. But like dipping my toes in and out of a cold lake – I just have to jump. So with great gusto I applied for a casual position with our local airline.

Now let me back up for a moment to say that other than my first job at Fabricland, or working a silly toy tent at the PNE one summer  – I have ALWAYS been a teacher. From volunteering in classrooms to teaching practicums to the real deal – I have identified (professionally at least) as a teacher for the past fifteen+ years. And now, a new hat. Customer Service Agent. It is sort of a dream come true – in that I show up, work hard and leave. No meetings, no prepping, no marking, no inventing new lessons, no worrying about a student or family, no reports (although with the teacher strike on this year, other teachers aren’t doing these things either, but that’s besides the point). For now, it’s perfect. I get to have my own time, to make a little money, to be excited about picking up g from my friend’s place, and last but not least – standby flights for Jay and I.

Instantly, the feeling of isolation and distance from friends and family that has hung in the air since we moved here, has slipped away.  The knowledge that at the snap of a finger (along with free time,  space on the plane and a little money) – poof – we’re back in Vancouver. So far it’s a fun job, and while the initial learning curve has been steep, I am happy to report my baby brain is slowly getting back into better brain shape. I get excited when I radio back and forth with the pilots, or when we figure out how to balance a full plane including a ton of frozen fish, three dogs and surfboard.

For now, this is Victor, Echo, Romeo, Echo, November, Alfa – over and out.

 

mmmmmamamaaaaaaa

I don’t know if it counts for her official first words, but this morning lil g greeted us with a ddddadadada and a mmmamamamaaaa. They were long, drawn out and possibly the cutest words I have ever heard spoken. They seemed appropriately used (one for Jay and the other for me), but then I heard her greet her breakfast with similar sounding words…. hmmmm… Regardless, it made me weep inside.

I doubt anything could have prepared me for becoming a mama. I read books. I babysat. I taught kids. However hard I imagined having my own – it just seemed so far away. Pregnancy tried to help me get ready, but ended up being more of a strange time with foreign cravings in an unfamiliar body that it didn’t really do much in terms of prepping. Holding a new baby nudged the reality a little closer, although for the first while it just felt like I was pretending to be a mom.

Over the last few months I have begun to find my rhythm, my style. I have begun to acquaint myself with this new side of me, slowing building a relationship with my new found identity as “mom”. Something solidified this morning hearing those words. For lil g, there is no pretending… I am her mom and always will be. And for that I feel truly blessed and deeply grateful.

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